Thursday, August 17, 2017

{Way to Love}

“These things will destroy the human race: politics without principle, progress without compassion, wealth without work, learning without silence, religion without fearlessness, and worship without awareness.” ― Anthony de Mello
The energy in the air is tense and hard to escape.
I practice meditation and my mind ping pongs off the rails, off the walls.
There is no silence. No peace.
And it physically hurt.
Eventually, there comes comfort in prayer and rest.
My heart syncs with the pulse of the Universe.
It seems once more, grace has saved me.

Right now the energy in the air is angry. And I can't escape.
I want to climb under my covers and curl in a ball.
There is the universe when I close my eyes.
Constellations with blues and Purple light.
Dancing. Waltzing. They tango together.

Yesterday the energy was unknown.
Driven by 1000 forms of fear.
1000 watts of a brain on overdrive.
I practice grounding. Breathing. Deep deep breaths.
There is swimming in the ocean. Melting and rocking with the water.
I am told THIS IS LIFE.
Be realistic.
Stoic. Stable.
Let's discuss regulating your emotions.
Opening your toolbox.
Here, lavender is the perfect essential oil to calm you down.
You are being too sensitive and naive.
Set boundaries. Those boundaries will save your life.
You are just too much. Too complicated.
Said with a face that I've seen a thousand times.

Right now my energy is vocal.
It screams Fuck You.
Fuck your misperceptions
Fuck your judgement.
The enunciation off my lips is crisp
and rolls down my throat
settling into hollows of my belly
where it festers and burns.

Today, four days from an eclipse and the energy jolts me.
I am free.
Riding my bike down a quiet, stone road.
It's 5am and lizards dart in front of me.
The moon is close and fills the sky.
Electric, expansive, erotic energy is in the air.
A warm breeze brushes my body
and kisses my cheeks.
God has hunted me down
and embraced me.

Thursday, July 27, 2017

{Chronology of Water}

“Your life doesn’t happen in any kind of order. Events don’t have cause and effect relationships the way you wish they did. It’s all a series of fragments and repetitions and pattern formations. Language and water have this in common.” ― Lidia Yuknavitch, The Chronology of Water: A Memoir
My love affair with the ocean deepens. Every time I visit the warm Atlantic Water. So blue and comforting. Cradling me as I float on my back staring at the endless blue above me. I stand on my feet, toes grasping the sand. On the horizon is endless turquoise blue. Which I find impossible to describe. Swimming, I keep swimming. And the water is the best pain reliever I have found. It's hard to leave. Maybe I'm a mermaid. I feel at home in the water:)

Tuesday, June 13, 2017

{Electric Avenue}

Because there's nothing more beautiful than the way the ocean refuses to stop kissing the shoreline, no matter how many times it's sent away-Sarah Kay
One of my favorite feelings is to stand at the shoreline. Feel the current of the ocean engulf my legs and move it's energy outward. Gazing at the items deposited and withdrawn at my feet. I've grasped for shells, sure that I would catch it. But alas as quickly as it caught my eye, the water says not so fast and is gone out to sea again. There are numerous sensations of the water, but none is as electric and alive as where the shore and water meet. It's hard to put into words and to left to experience and enjoy!

Friday, June 9, 2017


“The poet, therefore, is truly the thief of fire. He is responsible for humanity, for animals even; he will have to make sure his visions can be smelled, fondled, listened to; if what he brings back from beyond has form, he gives it form; if it has none, he gives it none. A language must be found…of the soul, for the soul and will include everything: perfumes, sounds colors, thought grappling with thought” ― Arthur Rimbaud
I sit with the sound of the ocean and grapple with thoughts. The roar, hum and background noise intrude. When I'm ready, I slowly walk into the water. Warm, salty with rocks and sand. Waves of the Atlantic are powerful and I underestimate their force. Unlike heights, I'm not afraid of the ocean. Despite it's force, the water hits my skin and it feels natural. Continually, I get knocked around and there is a moment where I look footing to an unexpected rock and am underwater. Salt in my nose, bubbles engulf my head. I pull myself out of the wave and feel the air. I'm in love with the force of the Atlantic. It's blues have captured my heart.

Thursday, June 1, 2017


“Nights through dreams tell the myths forgotten by the day.” ― C.G. Jung, Memories, Dreams, Reflections

Thursday, May 25, 2017


“Only the most ignorant still believe, like Saint Augustine, that time is a river. We others know it is a delta: that it branches out and seeks new routes, that it rejoins itself only to seek a thousand new courses. Some may be waterfalls, some no more than little stagnant pools passed by the tide, forever still... This is one of those times. A pool. I sink down in it. I want to stay forever in this water.” ― Majgull Axelsson, April Witch
Beautiful gifts from the sea. It fascinating to watch how the ocean carries in and out treasures, shells, sand...plants. I watch as the waves paint the shoreline. Cracked shells, delicate and pastels lay by feet. So very beautiful...

Thursday, May 18, 2017


"But people are oceans. she shrugged. You cannot know them by their surface." -Beau Taplin//Surfaces
The smell, the wind and the crash of the ocean. A nap yesterday in a lounge chair, with the breeze kissing my face. And the lapping, rushing sound of water. I dozed off and on for an hour. Taking in the sounds and periodically running the sand through my hands and fingers. It was peaceful and while the water was still too cool for my taste. I waded in to my waist and benefited immensely from the healing baptism of the ocean.